Job Description: Being the Chief Executive Grownup

The pastor had mentored a younger parishioner into parish ministry.  As he had prepared for her ordination, he made a list of the things that had kept him sane in ministry over the years.  The list wasn't from any book or class, and it wasn't in any particular order.  Of course, it wasn't particularly original either.  But it worked for him.  He had hoped it might help her as well.

1.   Water the grass, not the weeds: we can become so focused on parish problems and difficult people that we spend all our energy on them.  If we gardened the way we minister, we would end up with a fine crop of Creeping Charlie and a bunch of unhappy neighbors.

2.  It's more important to be in relationship than it is to be right: there is no shortage of people who need to be right all the time.  So stop applying for that job.  There is always work available for those who long to bring the peace of God which surpasses human understanding.  Of course, that doesn't mean that people will like you when you do it.

3.  Develop another marketable skill: it may be writing and editing.  It might be counseling.  Maybe it will be organizational or leadership development.  It might be teaching or coaching.  Maybe it will be flipping houses or selling insurance.  Who knows?  You don't have to actually do it, but there's great peace of mind in having options and alternatives.  And you might be able to serve in a place that can't afford you but needs mission leadership.

4.  Pray without ceasing, and read until your eyes water: some pastors do it in the early morning.  Others do it late at night.  The pastor did it most of the time.  But one of the chief responsibilities of the parish pastor is to keep her spiritual, emotional and intellectual tanks full.  No one has more than a handful of original thoughts.  A good pastoral leader is a prayerful collector of the insights of others.

5.  Say you're sorry, even when it isn't your fault: the pastor called it "eating crap for the sake of the Gospel."  He had lost count of the number of times he had apologized for the bad behavior of some part of the Church.  Of course, he knew that he had put others in that same position numerous times.  And he had learned how important it was to begin difficult conversations by saying, "I'm sorry for my part in this."

6.  If this were easy, everyone would do it: the Holy Spirit appoints people to the office of ministry because some of this stuff just won't happen naturally.  No one else was going to take on Bill and his crew at church.  No one else was going to challenge the self-absorption, materialism, and prejudice that are the part of every North American congregation.  No one else was going to be on call twenty four hours a day to bring the Good News in the midst of the darkness.  So put on your grown-up pants and get on with the work.

7.  Whining about it may serve me, but it doesn't serve Jesus: over the years the pastor had grown weary of colleagues who complained about working so terribly hard.  Almost everybody works terribly hard, and they know enough not to complain about it.  Pastoral ministry is the worst, best job anyone could hope to have.  The Church is the best, worst place in the world to work.  It's best to get on with it quietly or find something else to do.

What he knew was this: a pastor has to be the most grown up person in the congregation.  If that isn't the case, the congregation suffers.  The Church suffers.  And Jesus is not well-served.  It's a full-time job, being a grownup.  The pastor hoped he might get closer to the mark some day.